Sunday, September 3, 2017

On Our Wedding Day

Hey Babe,

You're well aware that I'm a wordsmith and given the contemplative nature of our wedding ceremony I had a couple of things I wanted to make sure I got to say.

The more I have thought about marriage and being married over the years the more I have realized marriage is among the most ordinary of things. Any trip to the grocery store with mild observation skills will lead to the conclusion that more people are married than not. Being unmarried after a certain age is more of a shock than being married. It's almost a presumed state. And does being married seem to have added value to the lives of those who have chosen it? Has it fundamentally changed how they are in this world for the better? Often times not. It is a neutral state of being: married. Normal, ordinary, and yet, if you ask anyone who knew me before you did, my love, you’ll hear that I was never getting married again. I had no desire to be normal among the masses. Furthermore, being a wife was not a status I wanted, it had been more prison for me than it had freedom and flourishing. I found the word married, the words wife and husband to hold such negativity that I couldn’t imagine ever wanting them to be attached to me again.

I can not tell you how much you have changed that for me. I was not expecting you babe. Nowhere in my consciousness was there any hope that someone like you existed for me. I have never met a man, or a person who was more fiercely committed to me being me. I have never been around anyone who rejected outright any facades I tried to give him, someone who was so committed to having, knowing, and being with the real Shannon. You push me hard in the direction of whole hearted living, the direction of my dreams, and I am in awe every time you do. You show up for me, the real me, when I’m a crying mess on the bathroom floor, and when I’m walking across a stage to receive another theology degree. You show up for my kids, you show up period. So yes, Dan Hall, I want to be your wife. And I believe that our marriage will be far from ordinary, this will not be a neutral state of being for us………
In you I have found the love of my life, and my closest, truest friend.

2 comments:

  1. Eeeee! Can I just say that I f****** love everything about the two of you? Knowing all the hurdles you have traversed, all the challenges you have faced, and all the healing you have accomplished together makes me feel a deeper faith in humaning. A love like yours makes me want to yell, "Hell yeah!"

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